There’s something cool here about your own personal internal storyteller,

they say there is a version of you that exists in every person’s world,

but the version of you that you believe exists in your own world does not exist because it doesn’t exist in reality.

I think that would be a negative version of you that you think exists that does not exist in anyone’s reality,

other than when you tell others your story.

Notice there is a difference between who you are and what you do,

and what you tell other people about who you are.

This is where it’s really interesting is that you really do not know yourself,

because you don’t actually pay attention to yourself.

We live in these sort of hypnotic states of two main kinds,

one is when we are lost in the dream of the story of life, we disappear into it.

The other is when we disappear into a personal delusion of a story of our life, we disappear from reality.

Where this is so in the everyday, is that you have a habit of always coming back to the story of yourself, it’s like no matter how far you climb, no matter where you go, you always bring back your idea of yourself,

but, that part of you, that part of you that does the story-telling, it’s just a part of you.

It’s like a process within your body running on auto-pilot as it was designed,

it’s not really more “you” than any other process in your mind.

Where this is evident is that the storyteller is similar to the unreliable narrator.

Your ego, your storyteller, for the most part, is at worst, a liar.

At best, biased to the point of blindness.

Your idea of your self completely disregards reality in favor of the story that it is currently

creating about itself.

It’s not really its fault.. its that it doesn’t take into account your life in all of its moments,

rather it only takes into account the moments in which it was active.

That storyteller is not active as often as it seems.

This is where it’s most interesting. Depending on where you’re at with your ego or how far you’ve expanded,

your ego storyteller is probably not super happy. It is unlikely that the story you’ve created about who you are, the story that you tell other people about who you are, is a very happy story.

Happy stories do not validate excuses for why we do not live bigger and better lives.

Rather, it is a story of pain and suffering that explains to others why we are in our current situation.

It helps that they could not possibly understand, and therefore they could not possibly dismantle the elaborate

tale we have created.

This is where that bias comes in.

There is a saying, I believe it is this,

`”You are not who you think you are, you are who you think others think you are.”`

A step in the middle of these two statements might be,

`Who others think you are.`

Now, you know yourself mostly by the story you’ve created.

Others on the other hand, they know you more by what you do in your actions when you spend time around them.

Because of this, in reality, others do know you better than you know yourself, because their perspective of you

is at least partially grounded in reality, even if they are only seeing one sliver of your total life.

What others see, but you the self forgets, and completely ignores with its bias, is all of the times that you

are having a good time. Even the most depressive people tend to have at least some sardonic laughter, or create some chaos, in some area of their life on a daily basis.

I can guarantee you that if you inspect this in your life, you will notice that your personal story about yourself likely does not tend to include the times you are lost in laughter and joy, when your light shines to others. It is as though we are lost in the light and disappear in the moments we shine in others lives,

and yet these moments are how others know us and would choose to remember us.

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It is from here that we really usually become our own worst enemy.

This is because from here, what we tend to do is become the gossiper of our own self,

we tend to go on a mission to change the way others view us to fit our story.

During these moments we even tend to change our behavior ever so slightly to fit that story,

and when others don’t like it, we choose to fit even their disapproval into our story.

In reality, they don’t like that we are not acting as who they know we really are.

We at that time were stuck in a sort of temporary self-perpetuated thinking distortion that doesn’t really align with our normal happy behavior.

My best example of this is perhaps coffee mugs which display statements about being angry or unhappy in the morning. If you pay close attention, it’s as though a person is expending extra energy in order to convince themselves that their unpleasant behavior is who they really are.

It depends on how connected we are to our real self, or how skilled we are at self-deception, that seems to determine which way all of this will go. Perhaps your ego is not too controlling and you don’t have too much of a problem with this. Or, this can become a basically tyrannical problem in which you have managed to convince everyone that you really, really suck.

This latter case likely means that you have been controlling your own behavior non-stop nearly all of the day.

This also likely means the outside world has manipulated you with its thoughts quite a bit,

and the simple reason for that is that our self-created stories which are quite negative tend to come from negative ideas that come from the outside world.

These are usually in music and memes.

The simple reason for this, is that spontaneous thoughts from your real being tend to be positive, not negative.

When negative labels get assigned to your personality, it is almost a certainty that you are borrowing those ideas and labels from the outside world.

That is because your own spontaneous thoughts are unlikely to assign negative labels to your personality.

It is not in your authentic nature to focus on manifesting unpleasant personality aspects.

It also seems to really depend on who you associate with. If you associate with unintelligent, unaware, not thinking people, it surely will be easier to sell a person on your story than it will be to a highly empathetic, emotional being who might see through your bullshit, and remain unphased in seeing who you are.

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What do you do with all of this information though?

The easiest, or hardest, thing is you just start paying attention to the fact that all of the times you are enjoying life, those are all of the times that should be factored in or compared against your personal self’s story.

An advanced option you have available is to apply ancient wisdom to how you relay information about yourself to

others.

This ancient wisdom is simply this, don’t.

It’s that simple.

Don’t tell others of your accomplishments is the generally understood concept here,

`don’t praise yourself, let others praise you`,

But I say, don’t tell others anything about your story, don’t tell others who you are.

Just act, all the time act. Let other people talk about what you’re doing.

Ignore it completely,

don’t even ask what they are saying most of the time.

The reason for this is only ‘fairness’ to me,

the self is unreliable to tell others who it is,

[ the right ] others are hopefully going to be a better advocate for you than your self.

In addition to this, actors act, and talkers talk. If you’re acting, you shouldn’t have time to be talking.

Let the talkers do that work of talking for you.